Teacher Voice, A Linguistic Register

It’s inevitable. Sometimes my teacher voice slips into conversation with regular adults and sometimes they get offended. Like asking someone, “do you really think that’s a good idea?” or saying, “I need you to use your words,” doesn’t always elicit a positive response. In fact, saying “use your words” to a disgruntled adult may invite them to use their fists….

Anyway, I am lucky. Usually when my teacher voice slips into conversation it’s directed towards some rowdy freshman on my floor. For instance, on Thursday of last week, I went to bed at 11:30 PM; a respectable time for adults but just plain unheard of in a freshman dorm. I woke up at 1 AM to some frat boy yelling, “Stuart” (the name of one of my residents) repeatedly. I laid there for a couple of seconds hoping that Frat Kid would realize that he was being an UN-neighborly jerk and stop yelling but unfortunately, he didn’t.

So, I stumbled out of bed to confront Frat Kid. My hair was a mess. My voice was all sounding like sleep. And I was wearing boxers that said, “I partied my BUTT off at Rachel’s Bat Mitzvah”. I was in no condition to be communicating. I opened the door and said, “You need to SHUT your mouth.”

Unfortunately for Frat Kid, he failed to realize I am the Grad Associate for the floor. So, he flipped me off. I was STEAMING. I mean, I understand that maybe I shouldn’t have taken that tone, at least without identifying myself as a person of authority, but still. He was being an A-hole. My immediate inclination to was say, “Well it looks like I’ll be calling mom.” THANKFULLY, I stopped myself. Instead, I said, “Ok, great, I’m going to need your Penn Card,” which I need in order to file a report. Frat Kid looked embarrassed, probably not because he was remorseful in anyway, but because he looked like a schmuck in front of his friends.

Maybe I needed the teacher voice after all.